Adventures In Food Poisoning

[funranium]

Yesterday I had lunch in Carnelian Bay and I did not agree with me in very short order.  The drive down from the Sierras was uncomfortable but not exceptionally so.  I feared butt trumpeting fit to bring the walls of Jericho down was in the works.  My sister shared this fear as we cruised along I-80.

By the time dinner rolled along discomfort had gotten to pain.  I figured that perhaps more food would dilute the ow.  This was faulty reasoning and it made the pain worse.  There was no walking it off.  Pain then led to nausea.  I was strongly encouraged to go to the doctor.  1/3 of the way home from Berkeley I decided that was good idea and went to the Eden Hospital ER in San Leandro.

Good news, four and half hours of lying down on an exam room bed and one blood draw later to verify an elevated white blood cell count confirming gastroenteritis, I was feeling better and released.  All is well.

What was happening around me however was amazing.  Observations:

• I was the only white man in the ER who wasn't a doctor.  Except for me, white people must not get sick after 5pm on the weekends.  It would be rude I suppose.
  
• I was the only person who wasn't homeless or patient from a nursing home.  The nurses were very happy to talk to me rather than anyone else.  Your standard of care improves considerably when you are a pleasure to deal with.
  
• More than half of the patients were chained to their beds because they were attacking nurses, doctors, and equipment.  One room in particular looked like a set from a slasher flick from where a lady had yanked out her IV and then gone spastic flail, spraying blood everywhere.
• I have never heard the numbers "5150" said so many times outside of a conversation about Van Halen.
• The paramedics that came in with the crack OD looked like they were ready for combat, not to render aid.  While there were all kinds of medical type things in the pockets, I swear those vests were of the anti-ballistic type.

In short, I am fine.  But I'm not sure I ever want to set foot in an emergency room again while conscious as a patient.  The last time I was there, I was running a drill for an emergency response but that was at 10am.  10pm at an ER is another world entirely.

Comments

[evil-egg.livejournal.com]

Wow. Makes ER and House look tame.

[funranium.livejournal.com]

I am afraid to think of what the ER in Oakland (Land of MC Hammer) proper is like.

[evil-egg.livejournal.com]

Part hospital, part warzone.

[graymalkn.livejournal.com]

I have never heard the numbers "5150" said so many times outside of a conversation about Van Halen.

Ah, welcome to a little entry way into my work world.

[pure-doxyk.livejournal.com]

Yup yup, and glad you came out unscathed! My mom worked night shift in a Trauma 1 ER for a decade, and the stories...ow. I don't think I finished my dinner more than once a week that whole time!

(My dad used to be in medicine too, so the two of them together have no damn manners at all. If it wasn't "guess what this guy had up his butt?", it was "So, we had this three-year-old today, didn't look like she was gonna make it..." Nurses are creepy anyway, but night shift in the ER was like nothing I'd ever heard!)